Are you in a happy and loving relationship? Or is your relationship not as happy as you would like it to be?
While there is no definitive list of what it takes to make a relationship happy, there are some common signs that indicate whether you and your partner are in a healthy relationship or not.
There are some common signs that indicate whether you and your partner are in a healthy relationship or not.
In today's relationship tip, you will learn 12 signs that you are in a healthy relationship. While you do not need to have all these signs present in your relationship for it to be healthy, the more of these signs that are present in your relationship, the better!
Let's look at these signs now!
1) You enjoy spending time together!
As obvious as this sounds, enjoying spending time together is important!
Common interests help couples enjoy spending time together, but are not essential.
If you lack common interests, don't panic. The way you communicate together is more important than sharing interests together.
If you lack common interests, don't panic. The way you communicate together is more important than sharing interests together.
2) You communicate well
Communicating well means both you and your partner feel heard and understood when you talk to each other.
A simple way to improve your communication skills with your partner is to practice active listening.
For more information on what active listening is, see Tip 3: Practice Active Listening, or download my ebook, "How To Listen To Your Partner So That He Or She Feels Fully Understood".
3) Arguments do not get heated
Arguments (in themselves) are not good or bad for relationships.
However, if arguments get out of control, or result in abuse or violence, this is bad for your relationship. Healthy couples argue respectfully!
If arguments get out of control, or result in abuse or violence, this is bad for your relationship
4) You have a relationship "support network"
It is hard for couples to maintain a good relationship together without others.
Times will always get tough, and in the tough times it is good to be able to turn to others to help get things back on track.
Usually, this is friends or family, but seeking relationship coaching can also provide you and your partner with relationship support.
Times will always get tough, and in the tough times it is good to be able to turn to others to help get things back on track.
5) You spend quality time together
Spending time together as a couple (especially if you have children) is vital for all couples.
What is quality time?
Quality time is time when you connect with each other.
Quality time is time when you connect with each other.
Beach walks, coffees, playing board games all count as quality time.
How much quality time do you need? Research suggests that you should spend at least two hours a week quality time together a week!
6) You touch
When I ask couples what their "love languages" are, almost all men say touch is one of their top two love languages. Some women do too.
Happy couples touch each other a lot.
Happy couples touch each other a lot.
They hug or kiss when they get home from work, they touch on the couch watching TV, they cuddle in bed at night. These acts of touch help keep the relationship strong.
7) You trust each other
Trust is synonymous with a good relationship. Any jealousy or mistrust (earned or not) can quickly destroy a good relationship.
So how can you know if your partner trusts you? Some questions to ask include:
- Does your partner make you feel secure?
- If you are out with friends, does your partner assume you will be safe and remain faithful? and
- Do you assume your partner loves you, and do they assume the same of you?
If you or your partner is experiencing issues of mistrust, seek relationship coaching immediately!
If you or your partner is experiencing issues of mistrust, seek relationship coaching immediately!
8) You have separate lives
It is hard for you to maintain a good relationship if you do not have outside interests that you can bring to the relationship.
You both should have your own friends, interests and hobbies! Often this is harder when you have young children, but be sure to arrange the parenting so that both people have time to pursue life outside of the home (and work!).
9) You respect and support each other
Research indicates that couples that thrive have roughly 20 positive interactions for every negative interaction.
This means that for every time you criticize your partner, you should praise your partner for 20 other things.
For every time you criticize your partner, you should praise your partner for 20 other things
It is hard to do this if you do not fully respect and support your partner. If your ratio of positive to negative interactions is low, seek to increase this as soon as possible!
10) You view yourselves as a team
You and your partner are a team!
This means that you share the relationship work. This includes housework, cooking dinners, doing jobs outside the house etc.
Of course, not everything needs to be shared equally, but there needs to be negotiation about these tasks.
11) You have a good sex life
Without a good sex life, you run the risk of falling into a flatmate or friend relationship. One of the keys to a good sex life is the ability to talk about sex.
If you and your partner have done this and still find issues sexually, seek professional help as soon as possible!
One of the keys to a good sex life is the ability to talk about sex.
12) You have shared goals for the future
Couples that work together on shared goals are more likely to stick together!
Do you and your partner have relationship goals for the next year? The next five years? How about the next decade?
If not, discuss with your partner what you want together in the future. As with everything, the more you plan it, the more likely it is to happen!
Conclusion:
In today's relationship tip, you have learned 12 signs that you are in a healthy relationship. These signs are:
- You enjoy spending time together!
- You communicate well together
- Arguments do not get heated
- You have a relationship "support network"
- You spend quality time together
- You touch
- You trust each other
- You have separate lives
- You respect and support each other
- You view yourselves as a team
- You have a good sex life
- You have shared goals for the future
While you do need all of these signs to be present to have a healthy relationship, most couples would want to have at least 9 or 10 of these signs to be present in their relationship!
For more tips on creating a happier, more loving and passionate relationship, book relationship coaching with me, or enrol in my powerful online course, Reignite My Relationship.
I look forward to helping you create a happy, loving and passionate relationship!
